Black on Black

October 24, 2007:

I'm not sure what to write, but I need to spit it out.
My expectations are faltering,
And I'm questioning myself more than ever.
I'm wondering if its time
To cut the string and really say goodbye,
Make new with what little I have
And start fresh, never looking back at the past.
Every day I can feel some balance
But every day I have a moment,
Where I want to sit back and cry.
I feel like a fool, a pondering fool,
As if I'm trying too hard to be seen
In the eyes of those that I hold so close,
Yet they are too busy, too consumed,
They can't let me in, for reasons unknown.
And maybe it's time to realize
That I'll never truly be seen,
That even in the moments where I show all my weakness,
I will still always be nothing more than that.
To say good bye, to put it all behind,
To the one who makes me feel like I'm home,
To the one who makes me smile in my darkest moments,
I'm the fool and its time I simply let go...