Accomplished

I recently went to ikea and got a lot of stuff for very little (i like spending little). The down side - putting it all together. But with the help of a friend who had proper tools (i still have not picked up the uber girly pink tool box) my place looks very nice. The past two nights i have made myself unpack boxes and get things in places because if i didnt, i was risking falling into the oblivion of thought which these days has not been a happy place to be. So i feel slightly accomplished right now. But what im really doing . . . Staying busy to fight back the tears. Staying busy to fight back the deep empty pit of your stomach feeling that makes you want to fall to your knees and give up. Staying busy to not think about why, how come, and will it change. So even though my feeling of accomplishment is a false reality, its the one thing keeping me from falling to pieces. Except my dogs, they rock.