crash

I'm hardening my emotions to your face,
To the memories and feelings that used to be,
To everything that reminds me of you.
This endeavor is tough and my strength is waning,
Music flows into my ears and suddenly I want only to hold you in my arms.
But I look around and you have disappeared,
Your presence is known, but to me, you are hidden.
For reasons unknown to me,
You lock me away and play me the fool,
I kick myself for sinking, but realize the heart can only
be so strong.
I'm hardening my emotions to everything that is you,
I'm picking up the pieces and praying you never come by,
Don't ask me to write, don't ask me to save you,
Please come home and do not let me know.
I don't want to see you, I don't want to feel you,
I'm hardening myself to cushion the blow,
For when I crash to the ground,
When you decide to finally come around
And I have to let you go.