I want you around....

This may not make sense. Pretend like you have gained a free all-acess pass inside Ezzie's mind. Here goes...

I want you around. I want you inside me.
I want you to tell me things that I've never been told. I want you to grasp my hand and tug at my shirt. Pull me to the beach, into the sun, ino the world that I'm seeking.
Give me the air, the clarity, the blue skies that make me smile.
Smile.
In a period of 5 seconds there was a tug and I regret taking it one step further.
I regret leaving. I regret not calling.
I regret walking away wondering "what if".
Make it simple.
Complicate me.
I deserve it and you know this.
Let me rest my weary head on your chest - I want to hear your heartbeat.
I cannot let myself let you in - that will be laid on the table.
I cannot be yours and you cannot be mine. We are not something that we want for each other. Not anymore.
I seek the blue skies and something more slender.
This pair of pants need to hit the floor.
Those shoes need to scatter and socks need to fly.
I crave something I should not - like caramel, chocolate and marshmallows all at once.
Something that came to me in a flash, keeps flashing in my mind. I'd like to kick it for sitting in my head. I'd also like to ravish it to the floor. I battle it and I wish it knew.
I'm hooked and I don't want to be. But I smile and that makes my knees weak.
Please do not fear me.
I hope you do not find me agressive. It was never my intentions.

I need it now, more than ever.
Whisper it please. Be gentle.
This is falling apart and I can only let it happen.
And I'm sorry to say - I just want to be in your arms.
I apologize ahead of time if we can never be.
This heart of mine might be too much for anyone to handle.
But thank you for making me smile. I still want you around.