you walk away

The strength that once existed to uphold this brave heart, has slowly started to diminish as you have walked away. My smile is half its beauty and my eyes show half the sparkle. Letting go was not a feat one wanted to embrace, but a reality that needed to be met. Discussion of a life so different is unavoidably in ill-comparison to the reality that has been decided. Many do not understand this great and heavy-hearted concept and decision - to them it is just a "parting of the ways" but for us, it means a lot more. Life is more empty now as I realize I do not have the comforts that you so nicely have waved in my face. If I did, I would not be sitting here, I would be out there. But maybe that is another one of my punishments in this great battle and war. You are to be the one who bounces back happy, and for you to be happy, I should be happy. But I cringe at the thought that I am here and you are out there - and we haven't even properly concluded. I do not know what to think. Or maybe... my life is meant to be empty of things that you have, because I am supposed to learn. Funny thing, I do know that having friends helps you get through hard times, so what else am I supposed to learn while I sit here and my friends are...... ????